- Saturday, May 28, 2005 / 3:22 pm.
Wanted to change my blogskin, but then did halfway n got sianz. Woke up with a headache. Sometimes i really wonder why i put myself thru so much trouble, why can't i just end it once and for all. I don't wanna fight with him, but sometimes its just so inevitable. Giving in doesn't solve the problem. Is tis a sign? Haiz. I think subconciously, part of me wans to let go already. Leave it all behind, but i'm still stuck in s'pore, n my life isn't changing yet, just another 1 more mth....
- / 3:13 am.
Your Birthdate: June 8 |
Born on the 8th day of the month, you have a special gift for business, as you can conceive and plan on a grand scale. You have good executive skills and you're a good judge of values. You should try to own your own business, because you have such a strong desire to be in control. You are generally reliable when it comes to handling money; you can be trusted in this regard. Idealistic by nature, you are never too busy to spend some time on worthwhile causes, especially if managerial support are needed. There is much potential for material success associated with this number. |
Your Rising Sign is Cancer |
 You are compassionate and kind - and the one who gives security. And while you sometimes tire of it, people always turn to you for advice. Emotions are your domain, and you use tend to use them for good. But you've also been know to be very manipulative when you need to be. You're quite loyal to those you love most - friends and family. For everyone else, you tend take time to build up trust. |
- Saturday, May 21, 2005 / 11:20 pm.
I seriously have no idea what i wan for my bday. In actual fact, i really can't think of anything that i lack. There are a couple things that i wan to get though. (meaning those under my wishlist), besides the fact that the items are ex, i won't feel good if they've spent too much on it either.
But, there is something which i wan though. Its a backpack, cuz, thinking forth, i will gg for my girlies trip, and also will be travelling pretty often ard aus, so i think this kinda of backpack will come in handy. Hee.. think i better go shop ard to see which one best suits me then. *grinz* (hint girls, hint)
On a serious note, actually, i'm happy enough that my friends will be there, most importantly, its a thought that counts. Then again, for those that havta rack their brain to think of what to get me, i can give ya a couple of hints:
1. If ya wanna get me perfume, i wld prefer DKNY delicious & Ralph Lauren Style.
2. I don't like wearing rings, necklaces n braclets/bangles are fine.
3. I'm actually looking for a simple small shoulder black bag.
Hee... Someone here is not 'thick-skinned' ar.. haa..
Another 50days to brisbane...
- Wednesday, May 18, 2005 / 11:29 pm.
I've finally managed to complete some important errands today. *phew* The long waited sending-out-sms-as-bday-invitations, i finally gotten that done. Been on my mind for quite a while, but kept slipin when i had made a mental note to do it ltr. Hee.. my bad habit.
Its also finally confirmed that i'll be leaving for Aus, sch fees n stuff are paid. I guess its not gonna sink in that soon, cuz i'm still feeling easy, haven gotten the pressure of packing and buying stuff yet. Its gonna be a busy 1 & half mth more. I've decided to push back my travel date, instead of leaving on 7th, i will leave on the 9th or 10th instead. But then again, until my air tickets are confirmed, i will still be changin my mind. Knowing me, i can get pretty fickle minded.
I'm very happy that my girlies trip is finally coming true. We are finally travelling somewhere together, the 8 of us *grinz* Just the feeling is really hard to describe. Tis 'dream' of ours has been on the list for the past 2-3yrs and its finally gonna happen!! *smilez* i'm really really happy. Its a wonderful feeling to know that i'm gonna spend 4days with my closest friends, makes my heart smile!
N my HK trip with Jia! OMG, tis darling buddy of mine, been there for me whenever i need a listening ear. I'm so so glad we're finally making our travel trip. We're gonna have a blast man, just the 2 of us. *grinz* HK here we come!!
I'm all over the sadness of my work and pressure already, i think i'm gonna start missing my job actually, cuz of the ppl. Attended my BIG bosses farewell dinner at the Ritz last thur, n my god, they really go all out for Boon, but thru the dinner i can see that no matter how high the level of staff, its always the ppl that matters in CTB. I'm really gonna miss all my colleagues, esp my shifters cuz ever since i've converted to CFT, i've gotten closer to them. *sobx* The phrase always remain: "once a shifter, always a shifter."
Finally realise that the pressure is actually doing me good, its making me to schedule stuff under stress and as well as organise my life properly. Although it gives me headache frm time to time, but then again, its still had a good side.
Last note, i'm gonna party hard for the next 1 n half mths. Its my entitlement!
- Sunday, May 15, 2005 / 7:28 pm.
Is it true that you don't know what you've lost til its gone and don't know what's been missing til it arrives? Read tis quote on one of my friend's blog and i found it so true. I realise that i don't seem to appreciate what i had, until i've lost it, be it a person or a relationship. My own faults.
I have been pretty down of late, life now is all bout work. I'm thankful for having work as my distraction of other things around. I'm getting weary of my life now, i feel suffocated, too many things to do, while in the midst, trying to take time off for some ME time. I miss the simple life.
- Wednesday, May 04, 2005 / 2:11 am.
Guilt-ridden. Thats how i feel rite now. Nothing i say or do can undo the wrong that i've done. I'm really feeling damm stupid and remorseful right now, that i don't know when it will ever go away. Saying sorry doesn't help, but i don't know other than saying sorry what can i do... I'm sorry.
- Tuesday, May 03, 2005 / 3:54 pm.
I hate working. I don't like the fact that my work time sucks. Many a times i wanna leave tis job and look for a normal one, but always, the money factor pulls me to stay and also the fact that its just not the time for me now to start learning new stuff esp when i know i'm gonna leave in less than 2mths, its just not in me either to leave bad impressions on my employers. I wanna leave with the right reason, not making it feel that i was just there for fun, i wanna leave a gd impression *smiles* I dislike the fact that my work takes up so much of my time that i don't even have time to have a proper dinner with my parents.
I don't like to be stressed over so many stuff. I dislike having to cramp everything together. Its less than 2mths n i have to do so many things, it worries me that i might be leaving things out. I feel sick thinking of it. Why did i have to go and choose to study in aus when i cld have chosen a different course and studied locally.
Is it normal to feel as if everything is being weighted down all at the same time. The mind-bloggling stress tat makes u just wanna lie in bed and forget everything ard u. The endless list of things to do. But yet at the same time, i can feel that i still do have the time to rent vcds to watch. Sometimes, i just wanna immerse myself into the show and have a heck care for whats in reality, wont it be great? I'm seriously feeling slighty burnt out.
I miss my friends, I miss my mom, i wanna have time with my mama, to go shopping and travelling with her and only me and my mom. I wanna watch tv with my dad, enjoying laughing at the comedies, I wanna bake with my aunt, cook with her and watch our cantonese drama serials together. I wanna go grocery shopping with my aunt, I miss our sunday mornings together. I wan to watch movies with my cousins, play poker with them. I wanna go back in time, to my secondary sch days when everything was all so simple, and aft sch when all we had to worry about was where to have lunch. To have our bee hoon soups & potato in the canteen, to have our western food lunches, or shall we just go ducky's place and hang out til dinner time.
I miss the simpler life back then, I miss the non complications, I miss time when money wasn't such a big factor. My life has turned 180 degrees since then, I've become someone whom 10yrs ago i didn't think that i wld become. Loving my life now ain't easy cuz it comes with so many worries. Sometimes i wonder do i really wanna live my life tis way. There are things i've done that i've regretted, things that somehow i wish i cld undo. But they passed, but not forgotten. Why is it that i seem to be able to remember my embarassing moments and regretted things that i've done more easily than my happy moments in life? Is it that thoes black spots are permamently imprinted in my memory. Whenever i turnover my past 21yrs of my life, unpleasent thoughts seem to come to thought faster than happy ones.
i need to change, things have to change, I hope aus will be able to change me in someways that needs to.
- Monday, May 02, 2005 / 9:34 pm.
Your #1 Match: ESFJ |
The Caregiver You are sympathetic and caring, putting friends and family first. A creature of habit, you prefer routines and have trouble with change. You love being in groups - whether you're helping people or working on a project. You are good at listening, laughing, and bringing out the best in people. You would make a great nurse, social worker, or teacher. |
Your #2 Match: ESFP |
The Performer You are a natural performer and happiest when you're entertaining others. A great friend, you are generous, fun-loving and optimistic. You love to laugh - and you like almost all people equally. You accept life as it is, and you do your best to make each day fantastic. You would make a good actor, designer, or counselor. |
Your #3 Match: ENFJ |
The Giver You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed. Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections. Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down. You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine. You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist. |
Your #4 Match: ENFP |
The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller! You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist. |
Your #5 Match: ESTJ |
The Guardian You're a natural leader and quick, logical decision maker. Goals are important in your life, and you take many steps to acheive them. You enjoy interacting with others, mostly through work related activities. Your high energy level means you are great at getting things done! You would make a great teacher, judge, or police detective. |