_* Work *_
- Tuesday, July 11, 2006 / 4:54 am.
This may make me a bit of a freak. BUT. I miss working. Earning my own keep. I have this feeling that i'm gonna be a workaholic in the future. Yes, i aim high. Very high in fact. Up the corporate level i want to climb. Sometimes i'm thankful that i'm not pressured to take over any of my parents' business, that leaves me to choose my path in life. But on the other hand, having a cushion to fall back over isn't such a bad thing.
Sometimes i wonder, how will i be like in the future? What kinda person will i become? Where will i be living? How much do i want to sacrifice to climb up?
My character has its flaws, yes, my friends are accepting of my flaws because they are my friends, but then other ppl will not. I make blunders in life, like everyone else, i'm not perfect. But sometimes, my blunders seems to grow burying everything good underneath it. I get scared. That my character will be the bane of my success in the future. That it would become the hurdle to doing well.
I know i think a lot. Think about things that don't matter or things that do. I analyse things in my own way. Some people might understand it, some might not. But don't u ever wonder about these things?
I've know from long ago that somehow, i see my future as being alone. Yes, granted that i have around me, but friends will always remain friends. It seems like the future will hold better success for me in career than my love life. I have been told that my character can be too much to handle. That i blow my hot and cold, fast. That on several occassions, i rather drop plans and join my friends than be with him. I have been asked, am i afraid of commitment? I don't know. I am scared. Yes. That there is a possibility i'll end up alone. But i hide that all under my cover. My cover and pride of wanting to control and grow my career instead.
It may all seem like nonsense to u, but haven u ever wondered across those lines before?